It’s an emergency - chocolate cake!

So mom’s forgotten where she put the “Monster Birthday Cake that gets bigger the more you eat” recipe. Your best friends and your second-best friends are booked in for the early party slot, and it’s at your house . . . because it’s your birthday. Happy birthday! But wait. This is an emergency! This is an emergency . . . chocolate cake recipe!

You’re going to need chocolate (of course), and some other bits and pieces.
The important stuff – ingredients. Mom get to the store!

The Cake:

Self-raising flour (note to nerds – you still need to pick it up) -  150g
Baking powder – 1tsp
Muscovado sugar – 175g
Butter – 175g, softened (Not in a puddle)
Eggs – 3
Vanilla extract – 1 tsp
Dark Chocolate – 50g, melted (Optional - another 50g to lick from the bowl when mom isn’t looking.)
Cocoa – 30g

The Icing:

Butter - 200g, softened
Icing sugar - 200g
More and more dark chocolate – 50g, melted.

The emergency steps...

Step 1
Don’t panic!

Step 2
Heat the oven to 180C/fan, 170C/ gas mark 4. Line 2 x 20cm sandwich tins and butter them well.

Step 3
Take a deep breath . . . and another. Repeat.  

Step 4
Drop all of the ingredients into a food processor and whizz. Keep whizzing until you’re dizzy or until the mix is stiff.

Step 5
There’s no time for step 5 – just keep whizzing!

Step 6
Put half of the mix into each of the sandwich tins. Level the tops and put in the oven for 30 minutes or until springy enough for mice to use them as a trampoline (don’t test this with your pet mouse – your cake will get smaller). Leave to cool (not the mouse – the cake).

 Step 7
Clean the food processor (it’s best if you don’t use your tongue). Add the ingredients for the icing. Whizz, whizz, whizz!

Step 8
Spread a layer of the icing between the cake halves. Sandwich together. Spread the rest of the icing on the top and sides. Build it up – make it gooey. If there’s one thing all your best friends and second best friends agree on – it’s goo!

Step 8
Finish your masterpiece with these amazing cake decorations by yours truly – don’t spare on the candles!

Step 9
Fall over, you’re exhausted!

Recipe sourced from For the grown-up version click here